A Reflection on Alignment, Values, and the Will of God
A Different Kind of Good Friday
Two years ago, on Good Friday, I gave a talk among pastors and leaders in a church.
At that time, it felt significant.
It felt like I was doing what I was supposed to do.
But looking back now, I can admit…
I may not have been in the right place.
This year, Good Friday looked different.
I didn’t go to church. Not in person, not online, not in the way I had grown accustomed to.
For some, that may sound surprising.
For others, even uncomfortable.
But I have come to understand this:
There is a time and a season for everything.
This year, instead of sitting in a church building, I found myself sitting in stillness – reflecting, resting, and listening.
And also having fun with the children.
Our children went to church on Saturday with their grandmother.
They loved it.
They love to dress up and go out, just as I did when I was a child.
And we had to allow that for them.
I felt peace.
But in that quiet space, I had to confront a deeper question:
Have I been following tradition and expectations?
Or was I truly following Jesus?
And more importantly:
Am I in alignment with the will of God for this season of my life?
When Dreams Become the Driver
For most of my life, I have been driven by dreams.
There were seasons when my schedule was so full, so structured, so focused on achievement that there was very little time for anything else.
One moment stood out.
I had accomplished something I had worked toward for years.
It was a milestone, something I believed would bring deep satisfaction.
And for a moment, it did.
But soon after, something shifted.
The path I once walked no longer fit.
I felt like an outlier – misunderstood, disconnected.
My dreams began to change, from worldly achievement to something deeper:
Purpose.
And even before that, several years back, I was searching for something deeper.
But my values had not yet caught up.
Growth and dreams were still my core values, but they were not anchored in kindness, forgiveness, compassion, or community.
Growth without the right foundation becomes unstable.
It can leave us feeling alone, empty, and unfulfilled.
So I had to ask myself:
Have I been so driven that I may have become blind to what matters most?
“What good is it for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul?”
From Dreams to Purpose
Many of us believe that a lack of money is what keeps us from our dreams or purpose.
Sometimes, our dreams are even birthed from making money, and we don’t even realize it.
So we hustle.
We keep moving, striving, pushing, circling in what feels like a wilderness of survival.
And in that cycle, we often neglect the very people who matter most.
I remember a season when I was accomplishing, growing, moving forward, but emotionally, something was missing.
God had already equipped me physically and mentally. I could do the work.
But emotionally and spiritually, I needed to grow.
I needed to learn how to love others – even when I didn’t feel loved in return.
That is sacrificial love.
Because even faith that can move mountains is nothing without love.
When we begin to live by kingdom values, kindness, forgiveness, compassion, these expressions of love change everything.
We no longer pursue dreams in isolation.
We fulfill them in community.
We walk into purpose, not striving, but aligned.
And I’ve seen this personally.
I’ve planned and accomplished many things without having the resources upfront.
God provided.
But I’ve also learned this:
Without alignment, we may miss the provision that is already available to us.
“For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works.”
The Power of One
As a child, I had two dreams:
One, to get a PhD.
One, to be a writer.
I didn’t know how to become a writer.
But I knew how to get a PhD, so I pursued it with everything I had.
I remember long nights, going to the lab at 5 a.m. and leaving the next morning at 1 a.m.
The pressure. The internal battles, not just academically, but emotionally and spiritually.
There were moments I questioned everything. Moments where my will and God’s will were in conflict.
But I kept going.
And eventually, I achieved it.
Not just through my own strength, but because I took the time to seek God during my PhD.
I used to go to growth groups – spaces where I was feeding my spirit and sharing my story.
That community mattered.
And I simply forgot.
The day I accomplished that PhD, I believed everything would finally fall into place.
That was the belief.
I thought it was my “it is finished” moment.
But it wasn’t.
Because that dream was never the destination.
It was just an assignment.
And once it was complete, another journey began, one that led me back to my other dream: writing.
Even now, that dream continues to unfold through the work that I am building.
That one dream—to do the PhD—is being maximized into everything else.
Family/community. Purpose. Everything.
You see, God has a way of fulfilling what He placed in us, but often in ways we do not expect.
There are times when we have to surrender.
Because things are not going our way.
Are we surrendered to the will of God?
The Battle for the Soul
When we say, “it is finished,” sometimes we believe it is the end of struggle.
But even Jesus experienced struggle in His humanity.
During Holy Week, we see this clearly.
In the Garden of Gethsemane, He prayed:
“Father, if it is Your will, take this cup from Me; nevertheless, not My will, but Yours be done.”
This was His moment of surrender.
Surrender and obedience are how we get back into alignment.
We pray for dreams and purpose, but are we obedient?
In 3 John 2, it says:
“Beloved, I pray that you may prosper in all things and be in health, just as your soul prospers.”
God wants us healed.
We are spirits living in a body with a soul—our mind, will, emotions, dreams, desires, and memories.
There is a constant flow of influence from both the spiritual and physical worlds—what we see, feel, hear, and believe.
Have we believed lies about ourselves? About God? About others?
The soul becomes a battleground.
We are not fighting against flesh and blood.
So when people hurt us, we must forgive and release it to God.
The burden is not ours to carry.
Jesus says, “For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”
When we carry what we were not meant to carry, our souls become unwell.
Is it well with our souls?
What do we need to let go?
The Cross: Values That Sustain Us
When Jesus went to the cross, we saw values in action.
Obedience.
But what happens when obedience is the sacrifice?
Jesus conquered the cross by living out these values:
Forgiveness:
“Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.”
Kindness:
“Today you will be with me in paradise.”
Family:
“Woman, behold your son… Son, behold your mother.”
Compassion:
“My God, My God, why have You forsaken Me?”
“I thirst.”
And then—He surrendered.
He did not have to do it.
This was love in action.
For God is love.
It Is Finished
Jesus prayed to the Father:
“I have brought You glory by finishing the work You gave me to do.”
Before he went on the cross.
“It is finished.”
Paid in full.
This does not mean the end of struggle.
It means the He paid the price.
We are not striving for victory.
We are walking in victory.
But What Are We Following?
So now the question becomes:
What is leading our lives?
Is it pressure?
Expectations?
Tradition?
Our upbringing?
Or is it God?
Because in a world filled with noise, the challenge is not access to information.
It is alignment with truth.
Jesus is the way the truth and the life.
We got the opportunity to live a full and satisfying life.
However, that life is found in alignment and obedience.
So I leave you with this:
What are you following?
Because we have the victory.
It is finished.
With grace and growth
Sanchia and team.
If you’re navigating transition, identity, or purpose and need guidance, book a one-on-one consultation and start your next chapter with intention.
Video Version
Please watch and reflect on the video version of Be Still And Grow: It Is Finished, But What Are We Following?